I saw him today. As I was walking, I caught a glimpse of the very man I had spent days reading about...coming at me from my right. I looked and then quickly looked away. I couldn't bear to see the hurt in his eyes. As he crossed my path I made sure not to make contact with him. I stood there for a moment in the parking lot...frozen.
7 cars
a grocery store
he and I
A couple of feet apart
....I watched him slowly walk away and I knew he was crying. I could hear the pangs of his tears smash against the concrete // rolling over small pebbles and making it's way to my shoe- connecting us....trapping us in that moment. I wanted so badly to hug him and to let him know that everything was going to be ok, but I knew that it wouldn't be....
not any time soon, at least. What do you say to a person who has lost someone ? I couldn't find the words or the courage to offer him my condolences. I kept thinking " go over there! It might make him feel better".
Suddenly, I saw myself approach him. My arms wrapped around his torso like a daughter hugging her father before starting the first day of school. Like an embrace held before prom, before graduation, and before going off to college. Before a wedding and after purchasing a home. I felt him remembering how it felt to hold his daughter. I could sense him trying to pick up her scent and to picture her smile and the way she'd call him "daddy". I could see him molding my face into hers and changing my hair ....
...and I backed away. Realizing I hadn't done a thing but watch the distance between us grow, i'm regretting not making good use of the time we spent in the parking lot. We passed as strangers.
great and full of imagery.
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thank you!
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