Thursday, December 11, 2008
Nothing he ever said to me was completely true, and I have to admit ( although I hate to), that I believed him. He had jealousy issues that we masked by his charm and wit. Whenever I found someone who could, quite possibly, take my attention from him, he'd convince me that something was wrong with that person and i'd flee. He spoke coldly and analytically about love and of other abstract things, when I questioned him- I was then manipulated back into the same train of thought; stick with what you know, never let curiosity grow. He was both the angel, and the devil on my shoulder. I had never, before, known someone so in tune with my stream of consciousness. He didnt only tap into it, he controlled it. I suppose that I could have stopped listening to him a long time ago, but that would have meant leaving everything up to chance- or at the very least, making my own decisions. To him, God was just a person created to give man a reason for things science hadnt yet figured out how to explain. He wasnt all knowing, or all poweful- just a fictional character. Man-kind wasnt at all real, they were aliens put in place to track your progress as you undergo tests. Literature was a time waster, and the cinema was created by the government to implant sibliminal messages into us so that we could carry out their work. I've been battling these thoughts for a long time, fighting with the only thing I have- my faith and intuition.